We all have dreams. It has been said that our hopes and dreams are one of the things that separates us from the animals. To some extent, I can’t really disagree with that sentiment. I suppose, that should I take the preceding view as my own, I must admit that it is, in fact, quite the double-edged sword. If we are separated–at least in part–from the animal kingdom by the existence of our hopes and dreams, then we are even more separated by the existence of another uniquely human emotion–regret.
Those who have never truly lost, those who have perhaps failed, but lost nothing, save the attempt at achievement, those souls have not truly experienced the true risk involved with dreams. We all have the simple, usual dreams, the dreams at creating a good life for our children, finding a love that will endure, perhaps we might dream of success in finances, for others, perhaps owning a home. All of these are worthy dreams, but honestly, they carry very little up front risk. To achieve each of these things, in the end, for better or worse, we generally (although not always, I suppose) will walk away at the end with something, even if it isn’t really what we had imagined to have when we began. The risks involved are usually attached to the obtaining the thing that we were searching and dreaming for in the first place.
To borrow from the song, “When this all began…” I thought that I would have the chance to improve my relationship with her. I envisioned a relationship where I could lay bare all of my inmost parts, my dreams, my fears, the things that pleased me most, the things that still make me run away and curl up in fear. I had dreamed of such a thing, in fact, I was so damn sure that things would, given time, work out in the positive, and that even if I did not achieve the dreams I had for such a bright future, things would improve.
But such is the risk of being laid so open and vulnerable. When we love another with our whole self, leaving nothing concealed, no place to hide away in shadow…when we do that, we risk so much more than a simple falling short of a dream. We risk not just the falling short, which is bitter to swallow, but all the same, it can be done.
When we truly go “all in” and we put all of our cards on the table, nothing up the sleeve, no ace in the hole, all in….We risk not only losing the things that we are pursuing, but we also leave vulnerable all the things that we have.